Sweet double-edged sword, my pleasure and pain,
Haunting angel of raw nerves, brooding smile curled lips.
At ease with saints and sinners, wise beyond all years and reason
Soulfully touches just the special few with prerequisite eyes
Leaving them always wanting more. 

A brotherhood of sorts, smitten from the light with grudging acknowledgement
Of each other as their only common bond.
A chance of a lifetime has passed before their eyes and nothing will look the same.
My muse is of the stuff which dreams are made.
Beyond understanding of anyone but me. 

Never unattended, always alone, watching my life pass in the faces of others,
I’ve often wondered what hangs in the balance of a random second.
Nothing less than life and death. Preordained miracles arriving unannounced,
Then vanishing into vapor. I can tell you right now that everything matters.
Every blade of grass indeed. 

The redemption I see is in those seconds of pleasure, a blink of each God’s eye.
Elastic, infinite and, yes, comfortable like the knowledge of past lives.
Mischievous experiments in the art of expectation, an in-joke for the twins,
With a word, a thought, a breath, it is there again unencumbered.
Preposterous as love without a kiss, sublime as trust without betrayal. 

This double-edged sword knows my mind as I present it unadorned
Giving light in measured doses, pure narcotic in each throaty laugh
Telling me that I’ve never known anything but still more than enough.
Showing me that I can’t quit believing in magic.
Hearing me yell silently through the clutter of existence.  


- Neil Hauser  2005